Psychological Exam

In 1997 when I applied to work as a police dispatcher there were (and probably still are) a lot of tests that I was required to take and pass to be hired.  One of them was a four hour 1,000 question psychological examination and it was really the only test I was concerned about because I had no idea what to expect.

When I arrived for the test I met with the doctor who gave me the instructions and put me in a room by myself and told me that the test took an average of 4 hours to take.  Yuck.  During that four hours I answered True or False to a multitude of questions like "At times I have the uncontrollable urge to set fire to myself or others" (my personal favorite); "I do not always tell the truth"; "I see things around me that others do not see"; "I am an important person".  These are just a few of the questions I remember.

About 4 hours later I finished the test and was directed to a room to wait for the doctor to come in with my results.  One of the last questions I remember answering was something to the effect of "When I see something that is wrong I speak up".  I answered True.  That all changed when the doctor came in.  He was a large man, and as he turned around and bent down to pick up some papers out of his chair I saw that his pants were ripped from crotch to knee.  I mean I could not help but see it---it was practically in my face.  Thankfully he was wearing boxers.  He appeared to be unaware of the show he was giving me, although I could not believe that he could not feel the breeze blowing.  The hole was huge.

So here I sat with these boxers and bare skin staring me in the face and all I could think of was that question I had answered "True" to.  "When I see something that is wrong I speak up".  Well here was my chance to show that I had given honest answers to my test questions.  I thought this might be a test---would I fail the exam if I did not speak up.  I mean, SURELY this guy knew he was flapping in the breeze???  Right?  As silly as it sounds now I really struggled with this for the next few minutes.  Even after the doc sat down, I could clearly see his thigh and his boxers on display.  Was I supposed to say anything?  Maybe this was some kind of new-fangled way of extending the psychological exam? 

As I sat there and answered questions and talked back and forth with him, trying not to look at the obvious I just did what I thought was right.  I kept my mouth shut.  Fifteen years later, I'm still working at the job that exam was testing me for.  I guess I passed the test(s)!

Vegas

There are very few vacation destinations that my husband and I enjoy more than Las Vegas.  I grew up all around Vegas but was never old enough to go to the casinos when our traveling took us close.  My first trip as an adult was in 1998 and I've been hooked ever since.

It's not really the gambling that intrigues me, although I do admit to playing the slot machines (and enjoying it quite a bit!).  I just love the lights, the crowds, the noise....probably everything that many people want to avoid when they go on vacation.  Speaking of noise, that's the way I pick the machines that I want to play---by the noise they make.  I don't care what the graphics or the payout or the odds are of winning, I want some cool sound to be coming out of the speakers while I play.  Pretty scientific, I must admit.

We try to get away a couple of times a year and while we have made trips to Nashville for FanFare (now called the CMA Festival) and to the Austin/San Antonio area, we are always drawn back to Vegas.  When we go, we try to see a couple of shows, but the majority of our time is spent wandering around seeing the variety of people and attractions that we have not seen anywhere else.  We've yet to go there and be disappointed.  Obviously, we don't go to win, but we have been able to celebrate after a couple of lucky pulls on the slot machines.

I'm a city girl who would like to be a country girl.  As I've gotten older I've realized the value of living out where your neighbors are not in your backyard and where you can actually see the stars at night and hear silence.  Part of that comes from the fact that I married a certified country boy who has helped me to see that living in the city is not all it's cracked up to be.  While it may be a while before we actually have our own place out away from the hustle and bustle, I think I will always be drawn to the bright lights of Vegas....at least for vacation. 

I'm not one for cruises or leaving the country, so maybe I'm limiting myself, but "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" is something that comes to mind each time I plan a trip.  We've always had a good time in Vegas and I look forward to many more in the future!

Sleep Paralysis



The Nightmare, by Henry Fuseili (1781) is thought to be one of the classic
depictions of sleep paralysis perceived as a demonic visitation.

A few weeks ago I took a nap on my loveseat on a Sunday afternoon.  I do this quite often on Sundays while my husband watches whatever game or race happens to be on.  On this particular Sunday I napped for about an hour or so and then woke up.  Or so I thought.  As has happened to me on occasions in the past, when I woke up I could not open my eyes or move my limbs.  I strained to do both, and although I could hear noises around me and was aware of where I was, I could not move.  Finally I forced myself into a sitting position and stood up.  But I still could not open my eyes.  I screamed as loud as I could trying to shake off this feeling and felt my way into the kitchen, still trying to open my eyes.  After what felt like several minutes, and still not being able to open my eyes I made my way back to the loveseat and laid back down by now starting to panic and wondering why my husband had not made any attempt to help me.  Within a few seconds I was able to open my eyes and sit up.  After talking to my husband and finding out I did NOT get up, did NOT scream, did NOT stumble into the kitchen and back, I decided it was time to do a little research. 

I've had these episodes sporadically since I was a teenager, but this was the worst of them.  Usually I just "push" my way through it and it does not seem to last more than a minute and fades similarly to a dream, so that by the time I am up and moving around, it just does not seem like that big of a deal.  This time was different and seemed to last longer so it stuck with me.  I Googled "unable to open eyes" and that led me to many stories very similar to mine and finally to the term "Sleep Paralysis" which is defined as "the paralysis that occurs as a natural part of REM (rapid eye movement) sleep. Sleep paralysis occurs either when falling asleep, or when awakening. When it occurs upon awakening, the person becomes aware before the REM cycle is complete.  The paralysis can last from several seconds to several minutes, with some rare cases being hours."  Thankfully this has not been accompanied by the terrifying hallucinations, perceived deafening loud noise and an acute sense of danger that others have experienced.  Some have even reported dream-like objects in the room with them. 

Additionally I learned that during sleep, our body alternates between REM (rapid eye movement) and NREM (non-rapid eye movement) sleep. One cycle of REM and NREM sleep lasts about 90 minutes. NREM sleep occurs first and takes up to 75% of your overall sleep time. During NREM sleep, our body relaxes and restores itself. At the end of NREM, our sleep shifts to REM. Our eyes move quickly and dreams occur, but the rest of our body remains very relaxed. If you become aware before the REM cycle has finished, you may notice that you cannot move or speak.  I knew of the term REM and NREM but never really understood how they worked together. 

I don't know if now I will be more relaxed if/when this happens again since I know what it is or if I will be more anxious wondering when the next episode will occur.  Either way in all of the articles that I read I learned that this is not a health concern and not a sign of any underlying condition.  There does not seem to be a treatment or a cause, so now I'm a bit more educated but I don't have much to do with that knowledge.  I have noticed that this has not occurred to me when I doze in my own bed, so I will definitely take that into account when I think about my next nap!